This picture, of our children, speaks to me.
This picture was taken on Sunday, during our Big Boys' Christmas Program at church. Aside from the idea that these children are on the altar, and worshipping in their way during this holiday season, it's the fact that these four children will forever be connected by the choices of the adults in their lives, but that they are still just children.
The little girl is my big boys' sister. They spend half of their time with her and their mom, and half their time with Ben and us. When I think in terms of ME, the relation between us is irrelevant. But, to them, they are a confused, strange unit. Ben cannot understand how his brothers have a sister, and he doesn't. He's been making up a sister, and her name changes every day. One day her name was Olaf, and she lives in the "North Cold" in an igloo, another day her name is Monkey, and I've never met her because she lives with her mom in a treehouse.
I can't decide if this is cute, or sad. So, I've decided that I'll let him decide that- that's not my choice to make.
As a tiny guy, he realized the big boys went away to the same lady every week. He's asked them who she is, and they, of course, have said, "That's our Mommy." And so, he calls her Mommy.
This makes HER feel bad - she admitted that she would be heartbroken if her kids called someone else Mommy. I guess that emotion never occurred to me. When I questioned it once, I said, "But Ben, I'm Mommy."
His response? "No, you're Mumma. Her name is Mommy." I realized that Mumma means something - Mommy is just a name.
These 4 kids will always be connected. It's up to us, the grown ups that have tossed them together, to help them learn the values of that connection.
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